I've spent the past six months or so hitting the ol' reset button. (Search on "reset" to find related posts.) It's a sticky little sucker, and I have to hit it several times before it takes. This is my year of renewal, my year for re-evaluating my priorities, my year for growing a backbone and becoming my own woman.
I hope.
I've been trying new things, like editing, and letting go of things which don't serve me, like an unhealthy preoccupation with what other people want of me (still working on this one, but it's getting easier). I'm tired of fighting. There's such an attitude of "go get what you want, no matter what! Don't let anything get in your way! You can do it if you never give up!" in this world that I wondered why it wasn't working for me. I'm a really tenacious person, taking those sentiments to heart. I've spent the first half of my life wondering why I couldn't make things happen like Trump or Oprah. So I decided since taking the path of most resistance wasn't working, I'd try to take the maligned path of least resistance.
Well now I forgot where I was going with this.
I think I was going to talk about my writing attitudes. Before, I always wrote to please someone else. I listened to other people's advice, and as you know, there is a lot of it on the Internet, consumed and regurgitated over and over without thought. Tried to please everyone, you know? And half--no, most of the time I had to guess at what people wanted--readers, agent, potential editors, critters, family. Each of them seemed to want a different thing, and it was impossible to please everybody. Froze me up. Too much resistance.
Well, I've had almost two months of forced time off. When I first broke my finger, it didn't seem real that I wouldn't be able to truly write until it healed. I couldn't wrap my head around it. I was really angry at first, had major withdrawals, not only from the book itself but also from the idea of writing. God, that was hard.
Now I see I should have done this a long time ago, but I was too busy trying not to let anyone down, including my dream. I wish I hadn't forced Fate to break my finger and my laptop in order to get me to reset this aspect of my life. But now I feel cleaner, like I might actually enjoy writing when I get the chance to start up again, and it makes my eyes well up to feel that love again.
Anyway, that's my ramble. Have a good weekend.
P.S. Got tired of scrapers stealing my content, so I'm syndicating only an excerpt till I see if it helps. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Scrapers will still getcha. They get me and I've been doing excerpts for a long time. Put a copyright notice at the bottom and it might help ... some.
ReplyDeleteI suspect you'll have the love again when you get back to writing. I think you needed the no-pressure break.
I think you're right.
ReplyDeleteI wondered if you still had Internet access, missing y'all on twitter and stuff.
I made a link with my name so that if I get scraped, I'll get a notice from WP that I've been linked to. Sometimes I've used this site for a little banner to put on my page: http://www.copyscape.com/banners.php?o=f
ReplyDeleteAs for your writing, I understand what you're saying about trying to please everyone. It's a hard line to walk because you want to write what pleases you, and also what pleases other so that they'll buy it. Then you have to please agents and publishers so that they'll be interested too.
You are a skilled writer, and familiar with the industry so you know how it works. I think your best stuff is what you write with your own voice, the stories you love to tell. I love when you write from your heart. And I have believed, ever since you said you were giving up writing, that it was only a temporary thing until you found your balance again. I believe writing is not something you do, but who you are - and I'm talking about YOU specifically, not writers in general. Sherri doesn't just write, Sherri is a writer. It's in your blood and something you just need to do.
Yeah, we still have Internet - it's just the Deadliest Catch marathon weekend. :)
Love you hon - you'll get it figured out, of that I have complete faith. :)
Scraped? Oh, dear I have no idea what that is. Glad you're enjoying what you are so good at doing again!
ReplyDeleteAngela, "scraping" is just when people steal your content and post it on their own blogs, usually just to support the Google Ads they have on their site. I didn't used to care, but as the scraping increased it started to bug me.
ReplyDeleteFal, we watched Deadliest Catch all weekend, too, like, ten hours straight Sunday. Didn't get bored once. 'Course, I was getting off the couch from time to time for family maintenance, richard only got up to smoke and pee, I think. :)
ReplyDeleteAlso, this time off has made me realize that, yeah, I am a writer, no matter what happens with the career side of it. I will be writing something, somewhere. It's an addiction.
LOL Yeah, we had them all record onto the DVR so we could watch them a little later and fast-forward through the commercials. It was OD on crabbin' but we loved every minute. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd just so you know, I'll be reading whatever you write.