My health seems to be returning, slowly. What? Y'all didn't even know I was gone? Hmph. Well I guess I have been an erratic blogger of late. Maybe that's why my blog traffic has been cut in half. Not even my mom reads anymore.
This migraine didn't last nearly as long as last month's, but it lasted long enough. I hadn't really recovered from that last one when I got a cold, and when that one wore off, this migraine hit. I'm not sure I've ever had a migraine bout this long, but it appears that impacted sinus stuff was the reason. Things are loosening up now, and my eyesight is returning to normal. I regained enough energy to vacuum the filthy, crumby carpets, neglected while I did the absolute necessities of laundry and dishes. Started doing the critiques I'd promised. Nasal spray helped, so I will squirt that junk up my nose for as many days as it takes to reach optimal performance. Oh, hello, Addiction!
A strange thing happens to me during a migraine state. As I said the last time I posted about it, it's actually quite boring, since any mental stimulation at all increases the pain and is therefore to be avoided at all cost. The result is a deliberately unfocused mind, where thoughts flow in and out, disconnected, disjointed, and usually temporary, since I'm unable to hold them and turn them over and commit them to memory. In, then out. That's it.
And I actually love that state of mind. I liken it to a what a zen master must be able to achieve, only without the pain. I'm holding very still, shutting out any external stimuli, emptying my mind, and I get very close to the core of my spirit, that quiet, thoughtless place that guides me. Too bad I can't remember what I learned after I surface. I remember what it felt like, though, and I see that as a gift. (For those of you reading my book on the fiction blog, I think it's like the Desmayo only made of light instead of darkness. Maybe I did tap the core without the migraine to spur me along, I just didn't know it.)
To be honest, I might never pursue that inner part of myself with any conviction if I weren't forced to go there by the pain of a migraine headache. Thank you, Universe for showing me what I look like on the inside. I'm done looking now. No more migraine headaches necessary.
kthxbai.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Migraines are their own special hell. Glad you're feeling better.
ReplyDeletePretty interesting. I'm only able to do that sort of thing when I'm sleeping. Things WILL churn between my ears whether I like it or not.
ReplyDeleteSherri I've decided I want you to come to Montana for a week and visit with me and Angela. I want you to meet and work with my friend Mary, too, who does body/energy work and my pal Milana who does EMDR. Both are outstanding in their fields, as the saying goes.
ReplyDeleteThink about it.
Plus I have another friend here who has suffered with migranes and neck and stomach and sleep problems, for years, all of them related to stress, as it turns out, and is having really good success, finally, with Xanax and accupuncture. I'm sure we all have to find our combination of things that work, but I sure was glad when she finally found hers, and especially when she stopped keeping quiet and started telling her doctors that she needed a solution and needed one now. That seemed to make quite a bit of difference for her right there.
love you, c
Migraines are hell. I think I've had 1 or 2 in my life, but Darc is stricken with them. Once he was in so much pain I had to take him to the hospital. He knows the cause of his though so he can usually attempt to head it off at the pass before hitting threshold. Being a witness to such pain is a terrible thing, I can't imagine what it must be like to experience it.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you're feeling better, and finding more effective ways of dealing with it. *hugs*
Your ability to find humor in all situations amazes me, Sherri. I'm beginning to wonder if I have this fragrance thing. My sinuses have been clogged and stuffed and runny for months! I'm sick of it! Thankfully no migraines, but a sinus headache can get close to it. Love ya! By the way, Claude's idea is an EXCELLENT one. Come see us!
ReplyDeleteIt's either laugh or cry, Ange. Laugh or cry.
ReplyDeleteI think you should read up a little on the different kinds of chemicals they use to create the smells. It's scary. I have some links on my Poison Scents site. I think a lot of people are irritated by different things that they would never expect because it builds up over time.