I'm in no mood.
Totally hung over from all the fragrance I inhaled yesterday on the field trip to the children's museum. I rode the bus to and from the museum, and that was by far the hardest part. All those parents with perfume and aftershave, and all those clothes washed in detergent with renewing scent beads or whatever they call them, and all those kids freshly washed with poison-er, I mean scented soap... I want to be supportive of my children, so I won't complain about it in front of them. They might wonder why Mommy needs to close her eyes all the time, or why she doesn't notice them talking to her, or why she can't sit with the other mommies, but damn it, I WILL be there for my kids. I just have to modify my there-ness. I'm physically present at school functions, but I may not be totally mentally there. Hopefully I can make up for that by being fully present at home. As I always say, at least I know what's causing it, thereby making it easier to reduce the impact.
Apparently Jenny McCarthy has a new book out about a link between environmental chemical exposure, like to mercury in fish and VOCs in carpet (and if anyone would like me to expand on those or provide links, just holla), and autism. She's paired with a doctor to write this book, so maybe it will be taken more seriously than if it was just Bulldog McCarthy on her own, with her crazy eyes and sharp tongue. If I felt better I'd do the linking and all that, but right now I'll just say I think there probably IS a link, and it makes me angry that scientists aren't really considering that as a possibility. As a person with a near-debilitating problem with environmental chemicals, it makes perfect sense to me. I think the research WILL eventually be done, and in 20 years it'll be, "Remember when we didn't understand the link between all those chemicals and illness? Ha ha ha, we were so naive back then. Good thing we know EVERYTHING now." (right).
Despite the fragrance, I was glad to have gone, and my daughter enjoyed having me there.
I dreamed about books and writing and publishing all night. I wish I could remember more than random details. Some of you know I've been going through some internal turmoil about my writing career (or lack thereof). You know how when you need to pee, trying to put it out of your mind just makes you need to pee worse? That's me.
You guys have a great April Fool's Day, hope all the pranks are harmless, and I'll see you on the flip side.